I'm Going To Have a Ba.......

Yeah, that's how far I got and she thought I was going to tell her that I was going to have a BABY! YIKES! Not exactly sure how that would happen since my Sweetheart is over 3,500 miles away and I haven't seen him since January. My goodness. What I ended up telling her was that I'm going to have a BAKING party. I've never done that before. I've gone to them at my friends' homes, but never hosted one. My girlfriend Heather is a wonderful cook and baker but has such a tiny kitchen now and my kitchen is huge and I don't really bake or cook, so I thought why not have a baking party!

We made all sorts of cookies. Snickerdoodles, oatmeal choc. chip, peanut butter balls, Cathedral Cookies, candy cane sugar cookies with peppermint frosting, frosted cutouts, Puppy Chow, and there were also lots of munchies like Chex mix, veggies and dip and cheese, sausage and crackers. Yum! Heather made Sloppy Joes which was great and kept us energized for the cookie making that we were doing. Heather's girls were singing the funniest song... I had never heard of it. It was by the Giggles and the lyrics went like this. "I've got the clap and I'm giving it to you, I've got the clap and I'm giving it to you, I've got the clap and I'm giving it to you, who wants the clap? I do! I do!" All night long we sang that song. Was so much fun!  

On Thanksgiving I spent the day alone. Had been alone in the house since Wednesday. I was a bit sad and depressed and I wanted to be left alone. Thanksgiving rolled around and I made myself a wonderful dinner of turkey breast, mashed potatoes, corn, rolls, and lemon fruit pie for dessert. Also, thinking about baking on Saturday was keeping my spirits up. I was really looking forward to it. Spending the day with friends, I have not had a party in this house yet, and I've lived here for a little over a year. It's about time I think. I really had a great time, and I hope to do something like that again soon. 
Maybe New Years? Heidi will be here... hmmmmm, something to think about!  

Do You Think Harry Potter Likes Green Bean Casserole?

I'm sad. I'm so very sad. I  had made plans to drive down to Kalamazoo to visit my sweet girl  for Thanksgiving and because of unforeseen circumstances I have no money for gas or hotel. I had to call Heidi to break the news and it was such a horrible feeling. I could tell I made her cry, she tried to hide it but I could hear her. She understood, like she always does, but it's still so very disappointing. I am thankful however that she still has family down there. She will be able to spend Thanksgiving with my sister and her family. She lives fairly close to Heidi. With the holidays coming up so soon there are a lot of commercials. The one that bothers me the most is the one for Campbells Green Bean Casserole. I cried the last time I saw one. She just loves green bean casserole. I was going to make it and surprise her; but now it will have to wait until Christmas. Not only does she love green bean casserole, she loves the way I make it. I normally don't get compliments from her on food that I prepare, but she goes on and on over my green bean casserole.


At this very moment my daughter is having the time of her life. What is she doing you ask? She is watching Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows. She went with her suitemate and family. I guess some other friends are meeting them there too. Every time there is a new Harry Potter movie, Heidi would go to opening night in her home made t-shirt with all her girlfriends and they would wait in line at the theater for hours. Heidi would then insist on taking me a week or two later. At first she had to drag me kicking and screaming, but I have to admit, the movies are entertaining and the stories are creative. I still refuse to read the books, which is the same for the Twilight Series.

I'd have to say, even though we don't get to spend Thanksgiving together or see Harry Potter together, she is still my #1 and I think it has sunk in with me that I am hers. She is thoughtful and amazing and she loves me. She called me tonight before she left for her movie. She calls me nearly every day and I just love talking to her. But her calling me tonight before her movie just meant so much. She could have called anyone else. I miss her.

Days 1 & 2 - Adjusting

I think we both are having a difficult time adjusting. We spoke on the phone yesterday and she wasn't her usual silly happy self. When we talk on the phone or in person, we give each other shit, goof around, be stupid, and laugh laugh laugh. There was none of that yesterday.

I did OK yesterday. I was focused on money, financial aid, Heidi's new job, paperwork, medical insurance, all the loose ends that need to be tied up before classes start. Heidi sounded sad, she hasn't made any friends yet. She put herself out there her first night but everyone seems to be there with a friend or two. Her and her roommate are amicable, but not chummy. I think they just need to be comfortable with each other first. My best roommate was a girl that I could live with but we weren't buddies. We respected each others space, property, feelings, etc... but we didn't hang out. Maybe that is the sort of relationship she will have with her roommate? I still think it's too early to tell.  I know she's frustrated about the money too. We never had money for anything, always struggled with the bills. I wanted Heidi to get to escape from those problems while she was in college. That is not the case. Like always, we started off in the hole AND have NO money for books. Her dad, who never sent her anything, is FINALLY stepping up and contributing to her education and sent her some cash for books, but it will only cover 1/2. We still need to come up with the other 1/2. She's visiting the financial aid office today for an emergency loan that will cover that other 1/2. Heidi still needs items for her room, computer, clothes, and I just don't have it. All the money in her checking account will go towards books. She never complains, but I know it depresses her a little to always be without.

This morning I had a difficult time getting out of bed. I'm not over tired. I just don't have any ambition to come in to work. I don't want to get out of bed, I don't want to take a shower, I don't want to do my laundry, I don't even want to eat. But alas, I went to work today and yes, I did take a shower, but I wait to the last possible minute to do all of that and show up late for work. I have so many challenges here and major projects going on and I can't seem to keep my mind on any of it.

I enjoy playing Mafia Wars, Farmville, and reading blogs and following Tim Roth on Twitter. I need to get back to doing that, and also start reading my Terry Pratchett books again with Vernon. That will put me in a better place than I'm in now and hopefully I'll get my mind focused in other directions and not feel so lonely, depressed and worried. I've also got school. My class started Monday but I was moving Heidi into her dorm so I sent an email to my prof. as to why I missed class. I haven't heard back from her. I hope she's not bitchy.

I just got a call from Heidi, she's walking through campus, in the pouring rain IN HER WHITE HALTER TOP! She said people are staring... well DUH! Like guys aren't going to stare at a hot girl in a white wet halter top.  So funny. I realized I failed to send her an umbrella when I got home Tuesday... Oops! She and I were laughing, it felt good.